I went to the doctor last week to make sure I didn’t have bronchitis (I was sick for 2 weeks and have had a cough for 3), and had quite an interesting visit. During the preliminary questions, she asked when my last menstrual period was. When I told her that I hadn’t gotten it back yet after having C, she looked up from my file with big eyes and said, “You’re not pregnant, are you?” I mirrored those big eyes when I said, “No!”
But ever since that, I’ve had these fears in the back of my mind. OMG, what if…?! I know it can’t be, but what if I was! It’s now been 5 weeks since I stopped breastfeeding. OMG, what’s wrong with me. I over-analyzed every little craving and feeling of disgust (ew, I don’t want to eat a tuna sandwich. Ahhhh, what if that means I’m pregnant?!). When I couldn’t sleep at night, my mind would wander. How would I tell people that I was pregnant AGAIN? They would think Hubster and I were animals who couldn’t control ourselves! My children would be less than a year apart! WHERE WOULD I PUT A SECOND BABY IN A ONE-BEDROOM APARTMENT?!
Alas, tonight my dear frenemy (Aunt Flo, as some call her), has returned to vanquish my fears. I never thought I’d be happy to have her return.