It’s Time to Let Go of the Fear

On Biloxi, MS beach

My whole life was ahead of me in 2008. I owe it to her to let go of my fears and really live to my fullest potential.

There’s something that I am afraid of. I’m not talking about roller coasters or spiders (*flails wildly*), I’m talking about failure.

I am afraid that I will fail at the biggest thing I want to do for myself: losing weight.

I haven’t been comfortable with my body weight since college and, if I’m going to be perfectly honest, I wasn’t really comfortable with it then either. That discomfort was due to adolescence and body image insecurities, but it was there. Seven years, two kids, and two rounds of postpartum mood disorders later, I’m confident in what my body can do. It is stronger than I thought possible, determined to a fault. I should love it unconditionally for that and worry less about the imperfections.

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Baby Deuce: 18 Week Update

How far along? 18 weeks, 4 days

Cravings: A long john donut – indulged this one, and no regrets.  It was DELICIOUS.

Aversions: Vegetables, meat, um…I think I have more aversions than non-aversions.  I have a helluva time eating anything that’s healthy.

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I Did It! My Pre-Pregnancy Jeans Fit!

When I look at this, I'm happy it *only* took me 6 months! ;)

Yes, I realize it has been six months since my son was delivered via c-section.  I never thought it would take this long or be this much work to get back into my pre-pregnancy jeans.  It’s been a bit disheartening seeing other moms get back to their pre-pregnancy size, or even smaller, months before I have.  But, it’s time to put all that behind me because it’s my time now – I DID IT!  Today I was able to button my pre-pregnancy jeans!!!

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The Postpartum Clothing Void

I was really hoping that by now I’d be able to comfortably fit into my pre-pregnancy pants.  I can button them!  I just can’t breathe.

I’ve been working out once/day (sometimes twice!) for the past few weeks and have lost inches…but not enough off of my waist.

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30-Day Shred

Have you tried the 30-Day Shred workout DVD by Jillian Michaels?  I first tried it before my wedding and it definitely delivers.  I figured that since I’m in much worse shape post-baby and c-section, I might as well give it a shot.

I completed day two of level one today and my muscles are screaming for mercy!  My ab muscles have never burned so much during a workout.  I find myself cursing my c-section during every ab-focused portion.  Argh.  I’m glad that I’ve done this before, because I remember that days two and three are the most difficult.

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Dieting

I was going to wait until after my 6-week checkup with my OBGYN on Thursday, but I couldn’t wait any longer – I joined WeightWatchers Online and got started!  Their PointsPlus program has a breastfeeding option, so I figured it was okay to start it since I’m not depriving myself of what I need to keep producing milk for C.

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Postpartum Body

Ugh…I didn’t want it to get warm so quickly.  I don’t have anything to wear!

I’m in this “in-between” phase for clothing options and it is not fun!  I have a pair of maternity jeans from early in my pregnancy that I’ve been wearing, but they tend to fall down easily since I don’t have the belly to hold them up.  I have sweatpants.  Other than that…I need to lose another 2-3 inches in my waist before I can comfortably button my pre-pregnancy pants.  Boo!!

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Breastfeeding is the Best Diet Ever!

This afternoon I had my two-week doctor appointment to check on my cesarean incision.  I was worried about stepping on the scale at the doctor’s office, because I inevitably weigh more there than I do at home.  Admittedly, I kept my shoes on so that if the result wasn’t favorable I could blame it on that. ;)  However(!), I lost 22 pounds!!!!  I am SO excited.  The most activity I have been able to do in the past 13 days since C’s delivery is going on a couple of slow walks and running a few brief errands around town.  Therefore, I have come to the conclusion that breastfeeding is simply the best diet ever.

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Post-Cesarean Weight Loss

One of the things that devastated me the most about needing a c-section was the length of recovery.  I was so looking forward to starting to work out sooner and losing the baby weight, plus some weight that I had been working off before I found out I was pregnant.  I’m still eagerly anticipating getting back into my Tae-Bo, pilates and Jillian Michaels’ 30-Day Shred workouts.

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