We live in an apartment in a residence hall on the university campus where Hubster works. It comes with the territory of him working in residence life, and I completely knew that and was okay with it when we got married. I totally support this part of his career and know that he won’t always be in a live-on position.
All of that being said, I often get house envy. Many of our friends have purchased homes or are at the stage of life where they are looking at purchasing their own home. Sometimes, I get really jealous. It usually happens when I’m woken up in the middle of the night by the girl that lives above our bedroom (she has the tendency to stomp so hard that our windows rattle). Or when our internet gets bogged down by all of the students who are also using it at the same time I’m trying to. Or when it’s 10 degrees outside and I’m trying to juggle C and 5 bags of groceries from the parking lot, along the sidewalk, all the way to our building.
It’s in those moments when I find myself thinking, “If only I had a house. It would be so much easier if I just had a garage. I wouldn’t be woken up in the middle of the night if we didn’t have people living above us anymore.”
In Jill Savage’s book, No More Perfect Moms, she devotes an entire chapter to “No More Perfect Homes.” There was one section in particular that really bonked me over the head with a reality check. She addresses house envy – how we always compare what we have (and don’t have) to what others have. She challenged me with this:
“How can you embrace the real living arrangements you have instead of wanting something different?” (p.159)
Wow! Okay, Jill. Challenge accepted.
Here are the positive parts of our residence hall apartment:
- I don’t have to worry about maintenance. If something goes wrong, facilities staff come in to fix it for us – and I’ve noticed they’re especially good with timely repairs for professional staff!
- We don’t have a mortgage payment or utility bills. The apartment is part of Hubster’s compensation package.
- We don’t have a yard to take care of. No lawn mowing for us, and no shoveling snow either!
- C gets to grow up in an environment with a high value of education. He gets the opportunity to meet a diverse group of people.
- I don’t have that much to clean. We live in a modest, 3-bedroom apartment. While it’s a HUGE upgrade from our 1-bedroom apartment that we had during grad school, it’s still not an entire house to clean!
Yes, I could only come up with five positive points…but I’m working on it! Jill’s No More Perfect Moms is challenging me to accept myself, my family and our life more completely. Things may not be perfect, but no one has a perfect life.
I am a member of the No More Perfect Moms launch team. No More Perfect Moms will be released on February 4th and will be available from your favorite bookstore. If you order or purchase the book during the week of February 4-9, you will be electronically sent free bonuses including e-books, audio workshops and more!