Weight Loss: The Difference One Year Makes

Slow and steady wins the race.

I have a really difficult time losing weight due to PCOS. I need to work really, really hard at it and even when I am successful, the weight comes off very slowly. I was on Zoloft for my postpartum mood disorders with Baby Jo. It made me gain a lot of weight in a short amount of time. When I was finished with Zoloft in March 2014, I was at the heaviest weight of my life. Knowing how difficult it is for me to lose weight, I was discouraged. I took a before picture. I’m still mortified to post that here, but I’m going to do it because I know that there are probably many people who feel the way that I did. Discouraged, hopeless, ashamed.

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It’s Time to Let Go of the Fear

On Biloxi, MS beach

My whole life was ahead of me in 2008. I owe it to her to let go of my fears and really live to my fullest potential.

There’s something that I am afraid of. I’m not talking about roller coasters or spiders (*flails wildly*), I’m talking about failure.

I am afraid that I will fail at the biggest thing I want to do for myself: losing weight.

I haven’t been comfortable with my body weight since college and, if I’m going to be perfectly honest, I wasn’t really comfortable with it then either. That discomfort was due to adolescence and body image insecurities, but it was there. Seven years, two kids, and two rounds of postpartum mood disorders later, I’m confident in what my body can do. It is stronger than I thought possible, determined to a fault. I should love it unconditionally for that and worry less about the imperfections.

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Pushing Myself Is Worth It

Ugh, sometimes I am completely drop-dead exhausted by the time I put C to bed at 7pm.  The last thing I want to do is wash his bottles, and I certainly don’t have the energy for P90X.  Last night was one of those nights.  I melted into the couch and watched The Bachelor, my Monday night trash TV of choice.  By the time that was over, it was 9pm and I just felt like cruising Twitter or flipping TV channels.

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